The Cruelty of Super Mario
by Smileyfax
Summary: Peach surprises Mario with a cake. Mario surprises Peach, but with something much less pleasant.


Peach waited expectantly by Mario's front door; he would be home any minute now!

She had snuck in earlier that day and baked him a cake for a surprise. She also prepared a picnic basket, in case he got back early enough, which they could eat outside before sharing the cake.

It was a magnificent cake, too - three tiers of cakey goodness, with painstaking detail given to the pink and white frosting. Applying the trim had almost taken longer than it took the cake to bake!

It would all be worth it, though, to see the look on Mario's face when he arrived.

Her ears perked up. Footsteps! Mario was just outside!

Mario got two steps into his house before he sighted Peach, whereupon his face slipped into a cold mask. "Peach. What-a are you doing here?"

Peach smiled brightly. "Surprise, Mario! I baked a cake for you!" She held up the basket with food. "And I also thought we could go on a picnic!"

Mario slapped the basket out of Peach's hand. "You-a thought wrong." He picked the basket up off the floor and started removing the contents. "Apples? What-a the hell is this-a sheet?" He dropped them to the floor one by one, where he smashed them with a thrust of his foot. "Sparkling grape juice? You've got-a to be fucking kidding me." He dropped the bottle to the floor, where it shattered, spraying grape juice and glass all over.

Mario passed similar judgements upon the rest of the food Peach had packed into the basket, throwing it onto the floor and smashing it. Peach's heart was pounding hard, tears brimming in her eyes. She fought to restrain them, not wanting to show Mario her disappointment.

"Now where-a the fuck is this fucking cake?" Mario asked, surly.

Peach smiled a little again. Maybe her cake would win over Mario!

She led him into the kitchen and gestured toward the cake with a flourish.

Mario stared at the cake for a minute and then, with a snarl, proceeded to pick up the platter and hurl it against the far wall, where it plopped down onto the floor.

He thrust a finger at the mess. "Now CLEAN THAT-A FUCKING SHEET UP!" he roared. "AND DO A GOOD FUCKING JOB! I-A DON'T WANT TO SEE A FUCKING CAKE IN-A MY HOUSE AGAIN!"

The tears had started to flow freely down Peach's face now, but she nodded, suppressed the sobs bubbling their way up from her lungs, and turned to look for Mario's cleaning supplies.

He seized her by the arm and jerked her back. "WHERE-A DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?" he screamed into her ear.

"I-I-I was going to get a mop and...and a bucket..." She was now terrified.

"Did I-a say you could use a mop?" he asked. He dragged her forcefully toward the ruins of the cake. "Clean it up with-a your fucking mouth."

Peach looked at the cake, then at Mario again. "B-b-but the floor is dirty..."

Mario got nose-to-nose with Peach. "I-A DON'T GIVE A FLYING FUCK! NOW YOU-A CLEAN THIS-A FUCKING CAKE OFF-A MY FUCKING FLOOR, OR I'LL-A FUCKING KILL YOU!" He punctuated the last declaration with a fierce shove, causing Peach to hit the wall and cry out in pain. "NOW DO IT!"

Unable to stop herself from sobbing now, she got down on her hands and knees and gingerly reached down for her first bite.

Mario kicked Peach in the ass as hard as he could, sending the princess sprawling head-first into the ruins of the cake. As she got up, she heard Mario's insane laughter as he left the kitchen.

XXXX

Peach was finally free to leave Mario's house. Her stomach was upset from all the cake and floor-dirt she had eaten; frosting from the cake had matted and dried in her dress and hair, ruining them both. She still felt sore on her back and her ass, where Mario had injured her. She looked at her hands, which were covered with cuts: Mario had forced her to clean up the mess from the picnic basket after she'd cleaned all the cake, and was merciful enough to allow Peach to use her hands. She was confident if Mario wanted to, he would have forced her to eat all the broken glass from the bottle of sparkling juice and broken glasses and dishes that littered his floor.

She was thoroughly glad that nobody else was around as she made her way back to the castle. Mario had thoroughly hurt and humiliated her, and somebody seeing her like this (especially somebody she knew) would just kill her.

"Princess Peach! Fancy running into you out here!"

She turned, horrified. Hovering behind her on his Clown Copter sat Bowser, the King Koopa.

"You shall be...hey, what happened to you? You look awful," Bowser tactfully observed.

"Well, I...Mario...I..." And before she could think of what to say, she burst into tears. (This amazed her, because she thought she was already all cried out).

"Uh...hey, don't cry, okay?" Bowser said, clearly uncomfortable. Looking around to see if anybody else was nearby, he landed the Clown Copter and approached Peach cautiously. When he was within arm's length, he extended his and tentatively patted Peach's arm. "There there...it'll be alright."

Suddenly (and surprisingly, to both of them), Peach leaned into Bowser's reach, and he instinctively wrapped both his arms around her. Looking down at her weeping form (which clutched him back with the intensity of a Koopa Troopa's bite), he gently picked her all the way up, brought her into the Clown Copter, and flew off into the distance. 


End file.
